Frequently Asked Questions from Birthparents

 

What types of birth mothers does Amaris Adoptions work with?
We work with birth mothers from all walks of life – from anywhere in the US, all ages, races, religions, etc.

What if I’m unsure about adoption?
Most women aren’t sure about their decision when they contact us. We can help you get information so that you can take your time to decide if adoption is a good choice for you and your baby.

How soon do I have to decide?
You can take all the time you need to decide. Getting information is the first step. We take calls from women at every stage of pregnancy and even after the baby has been born. Sometimes a mother realizes that parenting isn’t the best solution after she has taken her baby home from the hospital. It is never too late to choose adoption.

Who chooses adoption?
Women of all ages and stages in life choose adoption. For some, this is their first child; others are parenting older children right now. Both single women and married couples choose adoption when they believe it is the best way to provide what they dream of for their child.

I already have a child. Can I choose adoption?
At times, women consider adoption during their pregnancy but in the end, they decide to parent their child. For some, parenting is a good decision, but others realize that adoption may have been a better choice based on their circumstances. Whatever the circumstances, women who choose adoption do so because they love their baby and want the best for him/her. It is never too late to choose adoption. Those who choose adoption for an older child are still able to choose and meet the family and receive exchanges throughout the child’s life.

What if my baby is born with a disability?
There are families prepared and looking to adopt special-needs children..

Can I choose a family for my baby?
Yes! You can choose the family for your baby and have the opportunity to meet them. You can also get pictures and letters throughout the years with updates from the family that you choose to parent your child.

How do I know the family I choose will be a good family?
All families go through a lengthy home study process to qualify to become parents. This includes interviews with a caseworker, home visits, references from friends and family, verification of income and employment, criminal and child abuse background checks, adoption education, parenting classes and medical evaluations. You will also be able to meet and get acquainted with them personally.

What will my baby know about me?
Your child will know what you want him/her to know about you and your reasons for choosing adoption. He/she will know that you made this decision because you loved him/her. We will ask you for information about yourself and your medical history to share with the adoptive parents and your child. You will have the opportunity to write a letter to your child for the adoptive parents to read to him/her someday, if you so wish. You can also keep in touch with your child and the family through letters and pictures.

Will I be able to see my baby in the hospital?
Yes. You can see your baby as much or as little as you choose. We will help you work through your hospital plan based on the things that are important to you.

A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling. Psalm 68:5

Is adoption permanent?
Yes, and because adoption is permanent we will do everything we can to prepare you so you can be sure of your decision before you sign any of the adoption paperwork. Because adoption is such an important decision, we will meet with you throughout your pregnancy as you personalize your adoption plan.

Can I name my baby?
Yes, you may name your baby if you like. However, the adoptive parents are not obligated to call the baby by the name you have chosen. When the adoption is finalized in court, the name given by the adoptive parents becomes the legal name.

Why choose Open Adoption?
We believe it is the healthiest situation for all members of the adoption triad. The purpose of open adoption is to comfort and encourage you with the knowledge of your child’s well-being, to provide answers for the child and to empower the adoptive parents in raising their child.

What is the adoption triad?
The adoption triad is a term used to describe the three-sided relationship that exists in an adoption between birth parents, adoptive parents and the adopted child.

What rights does the birth father have under California law?
In most states, the child’s father will generally fall into one of two categories: presumed or alleged. A presumed father is a man who is married to the mother or who has actively exercised his parental rights throughout the pregnancy. His rights are the same as the mother. An alleged father has fewer rights, but must be notified of the adoption plan. He does not need to affirmatively consent to an adoption in order to proceed with a placement, although his cooperation is important and should be obtained whenever possible. It is important to discuss the rights of a birthfather with your attorney, as this varies from state to state.

When and how does a birthmother consent to an adoption placement under California law?
The birthmother cannot sign a legally binding consent to an adoption under California law until after her child is born and she has been medically discharged from the hospital. In addition, she is required to receive counseling before signing her consent.

How long do birthparents have to change their mind?
This varies from state to state, but in California, they have 30 days after signing the consent form. The birthmother has the option in California to waive the 30 days. Once her consent has become irrevocable, it is binding even though the adoption has not been finalized.

What are allowable and appropriate expenses of birthmothers which may be paid or reimbursed under California law?
California law states that it is a crime to condition the placement of a child for adoption on the payment of money. California does make it lawful to pay maternity connected medical expenses or necessary living expenses of the birthmother during the pregnancy and post-birth recovery periods as an act of charity. Typically, prenatal support is limited to the last 3 months of pregnancy and post-birth support is limited to 8 weeks after a natural delivery, or 12 weeks after a Caesarean delivery. Allowable expenses under California law include medical expenses and may also include maternity clothing, as well as assistance with housing, food, utilities and transportation costs in appropriate cases.

What if I’m matched with an adoptive family through another source?
Notify Amaris Adoptions immediately. You are still eligible for us to minister to you if you need it.